tsujigiri

The editorial comments of Chris and James, covering the news, science, religion, politics and culture.

"I'd take the awe of understanding over the awe of ignorance any day." -Douglas Adams

Saturday, January 11, 2003

I finally rented Grand Theft Auto: Vice City this weekend. Oh man. Oh mannnn. It has liesure suits, Delorians, teal hawian shirts, motorcycles... everything. I loved the mission where I had to chase the mob boss around on a golf course to run his golf cart into the ocean. He heee. The salsa music and the golf pants and the body guards trying to beat me with golf clubs were the best part. And the radio content lives up to the GTA tradition. I love all the commercials that make reference to commies and nukes. (A mother's voice is heard, yelling, "What is this book, young man?! From now on the only Engels you'll be reading is Laura Engels Wilder!" Then the public service announcer says something to the effect of "if your child shows an unusual interest in recycling, labor issues, or sharing, he may be associating with communists..." He heeee). This game rules.

We're experiencing a new kind of cold here in Edmonton. It's -16 C (-22 with wind-chill), which I believe is flirting with absolute zero. The humidity is extremely low, so it doesn't feel as uncomfortable as you might think. I don't bundle up as much as I would on a typical day in Salt Lake this time of year. But it feels really different. If I take a deep breath, it doesn't make my lungs ache. It makes my teeth ache. The instant I step outside I feel the moisture freeze on my face and in my nose. My eyebrows feel frosty. I wandered around on campus yesterday, marvelling at this new sensation. It's colder here than in any walk-in freezer, so I can honestly say I've never felt cold quite like this before.

Friday, January 10, 2003

Film recommendation: I just finished watching "Enlightenment Guaranteed." It's a German film about two German brothers who decide to live for a while in a monastery in Japan. One of the brothers is apparently a Fung Shui consultant by trade, and wants to plug into the whole zen-inner-peace thing. There's a lot of zen stuff in the movie. I guess it's about as preachy as zen can get, but it isn't too obnoxious. I thought it was awesome. You will have to watch it and find your own way for it to be awesome.

Sunday, January 05, 2003

Letter from my landlord. We arrived home to our pristine apartment to find this letter:

"On December 19, 2002 when your suite was inspected I noted [in the five fucking seconds I was in there while I was checking the fucking smoke alarm] that there is an excessive amount of papers [spread around Chris's fucking desk because he was fucking working on his fucking thesis when that cunt manager barged in] and [two] grocery bags in your suite and the suite is very dirty [what the fuck!?]. Paper and plastic are very flammable [especially ink jet paper] and this causes us concern for your [mutherfucking] safety and the safety of the other [mutherfucking] tenants. When a suite is not kept clean there is a chance of there being a problem with carpet beetles, grain beetles, etc. [I know that I made all this bullshit up. I just wanted to be a total cunt building manager bitch.]
   We would ask that all excessive papers and bags are removed and the suite maintained in a neat and orderly manner [much like it basically was when I "inspected" it the first fucking time, as I would have seen if I fucking looked at it and wasn't such a cunt-fucking barnyard whore]. The suite will be re-inspected on January 13, 2003 at 10 [fucking] A.M.