Elizabeth Smart found alive! I can barely believe it. They spent months plastering North America with flyers (I saw one not far from the Canadian border in October). She turned up in Sandy. Here's the Yahoo article about it. To top it all off, it turns out the Jesus Beggar* did it!!! Recognize this guy? * The Jesus Beggar is often called "The Moses Beggar" by dumshit Mormons who don't want to be blasphemous but who don't mind sounding blasphemous to conservative religious Jews. Althought he calls himself "Emmanuel," which is a Biblical name for Jesus... But what the hell do I know. I'm a gentile in both the Mormon and Jewish senses of the word, so I have no particular rights to express any opinions on the subject. Meanwhile, "Shandy Cushing said she brought her daughters Brynn, 7, and Demi, 9, down to the corner Wednesday to 'show them that miracles do happen.' " That's right, kids, God clearly intervened to bring Elisabeth home. He didn't do squat to keep her from being kidnapped in the first place, but at least He cleared things up this time. It's rare, but it happens.