You may have heard about the kid who survived a car crash by flying through the air and grabbing hold of some power lines. This article from The New Orleans Channel explains the story, but adds a curious ending:

Justin Elan drove the other vehicle that was involved in the accident. He said that one of the things that caught his attention was a Bible that Thompson had in his jeep. Thompson agreed that surviving the accident almost without a scratch was miraculous. "God was definitely in control, and that's all I can say. There's no way that a coincidence would happen that I made it through five rolls (with) no head injury, not wearing my seatbelt, and flew onto power lines," Thompson said. "And I just happened to land on the neutral power line that had now power."

I can accept that people seldom understand the definition of "coincidence." But when during all this did Elan have time to notice the Bible in the other car? Did he notice the Bible while speeding toward Thompson's jeep? Was he distractedly nodding his head with approval when he caused the accident? Or did the Bible fly out along with Thompson during one of the five rolls? And why did the New Orleans Channel feel moved to quote the religious interpretation of the survivor?

No one ever says "Man, God was amazingly uninvolved in my incredible brush with death today!" This doesn't get said because God doesn't enter the mind of a non-religious survivor. I therefore propose to all my non-religious friends and associates that, should you ever find yourself in amazingly fortuitous circumstances which draw media attention, remember to note how unmiraculous it all is. Perhaps also mention how you are proud to be in the luckier tail distribution of the completely explicable statistics of chance events. "The odds of me getting rescued like that must be the same as being in a plane crash! I guess the coin toss was really on my side this time!"